School Days... ???

Ryan and I have been very busy. It's nearing the end of hosting signup, which means I am trying to get any and every opportunity to speak about the orphan hosting ministry. Between last Sunday and today I've had 5 different singing and/or speaking opportunities. One was in the evening and as I was leaving Ryan said... "you are going to talk about me again?" Funny, but yes, I'll be talking about you for the rest of my life. I followed up with, "don't you want to hear me sing again?" He quickly said no, then followed it up with, "but I hear you sing every day." Truly though, he's been a great sport about accompanying me to the daytime functions.

Ryan is LOVING having a soccer team. This is his first chance ever to be on a "real" team. He loves the team concept. All during the week he talks about his game coming up on Saturday. Coach Dad is, of course, "required" by law or something to teach him about American football. With that, Ryan asked me this week if his Upward team won the next 7 games in a row, did they get to play a big, final game? As you can see, the sports are running together and there's been too much superbowl talk! (Ha) Yesterday I used the NFL draft to point out that the people sitting at those tables with those athletes were their momma's and daddy's... i.e. I will always be important...always! And, one day when he has his name etched on a table sign, I will gaze ever so sweetly into the camera and wave to everyone and say, "that's my boy." Now I just need one of those Chunky Soup commercials to come on so I can further illustrate my point, that momma's are FOREVER important, not just at draft tables but in his subsequent commercials as well!

Oh my, now my need of prayer! While we never considered this before now, we are now and find ourselves in new territory. Observing Ryan, getting to know him, realizing the special needs he has to build foundational, key things these next couple years in particular... we are considering and entertaining the idea of Christian School. This is for several reason. This is not about dogging public education, seeing as we are both public school teachers. Ryan's class in Latvia was TINY. Now that he's gone, he said there are 3 remaining 7th graders! His entire school was in sort of a small two-story house. Plus, he is not a fan of crowds. If there is a crowd, he would just as soon find a way out of it. He's quite social, but larger group settings just make him a little uneasy. So, throwing him into a 1000+ enrollment strikes me as something he's not ready for. He will also need very patient teachers. He has alot to learn, not just in subject matter, but in boundaries, cultural norms, social skills, etc. This first year will be critical in how he embraces schooling in America. In that regards, being surrounded by Godly people who will practice grace, mercy and loving discipline, will be a priceless addition to his growth and maturation here.

Finally, he's been surrounded by the "world" for so long. I want to think he's paid his dues in full to meanness, abuse, apathy and cruelty. He's more than seen the darkness of humanity, he's lived it. I think he deserves and needs to be surrounded by love, salt and light. I pray he never again has to re-visit the depths of human sin that he has witnessed. Everyone should pray their children never experience such, but mine already has.

This schooling decision isn't as much about his protection as it is about his redemption and his restoration. We as humans and sinners don't deserve much of what God blesses us with. But, every once in a while, he just blesses us for our patience and faith. I'd like to think that's how it will be this fall for Ryan. He isn't perfect, but he's had a certain amount of faith and patience, he's held onto hope when everything around him was screaming otherwise. I'd personally like to think this is God's plan, just to bless my son for holding on, not growing hard-hearted and not becoming bitter. Joel 2 says, "I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten." I believe God is opening our eyes and placing this idea on our hearts because He himself wants to bless Ryan with an environment that is loving, kind, gracious and patient. For how long? I don't know. I'm thinking at least 2 years, 7th and 8th grade. Then, if he's ready and grounded, maybe he'd like to go to high school with his dad. I can't see the future, only what I feel led to right now and this is how we are leaning. We would ask for your prayers. As public educators, we are not wealthy people and this type of education is not free. We desperately need God's wisdom and guidance starting now. One thing we're praying about is if it's God's plan for me to get a position at such a school, that would certainly help, as the children of employees are on reduced rates and it would be an answer to two prayers 1) our son's education and 2) where does God plan to plant me this fall job-wise?

Everything is our world is so new, not unlike many other brand-new parents. I pray alot. I cry alot. Not because I'm sad of course, but I just look at the face of this precious commodity God has given me. I feel so vulnerable and, at the same time, he looks so vulnerable to me. Not in the natural of course, but I see the condition of his heart. You know, I have my first Mother's Day coming up and I'm more than a little excited! I was thinking in church this morning, if someone asked me on my 1st Mother's Day what I loved most about my child, what would I say? Others could draw on their child's strength's and accomplishments. They could reference all the wonderful things their child has done. But, I don't even know entirely who Ryan is yet! I don't know all his strength's and bless his heart, his first accomplishment might have been the red star (for best defense) he won at the Upward game on Saturday. The only reason I'd be able to give is... because he's mine. And, know what, that's pretty good reason to me! God Bless everyone! Thanks for your encouragement, thanks for reading, thanks for praying!

2nd Adoption Trip Coming Up

I got a call this morning. Our 2nd of 3 court appearances in Latvia will be Wednesday, May 7th. The 2nd court appearance is incredibly simple and short, yet requires one parent and the child's attendance, if over age 12. Appearance for the 3rd court requires an elapsed time frame of 21 days minimum after the 2nd court. So, it's possible our 3rd and final court completing his adoption could be late May/early June. We have an additional legal issue we need to enter into here in the US, but can't start until his adoption is complete. It would be wonderful to begin that at the start of the summer so hopefully everything regarding him legally could be complete before school begins. God is in control of all these dates and times, He's moved this child along so fast that we can barely keep up! It's just greater evidence that He too wishes him to be able to begin his new life without any more strings or legal proceedings.

Celebration "Shower"

As I understand it right now, Ryan's "shower" will be Saturday, May 3rd, 10-12am. Amy Herring is hosting it at her home. Her email is jaboherring@bellsouth.net.

I've been asked for ideas and these are my thoughts. I've taken Ryan to Target and Walmart and he did a registry at both. (Check under my name at each) Granted, the registry might drive you a little crazy because we were all over the store! There are some duplicates between stores, but other things are originals. I tried my best to corral him on some things, but some I know he will have to save his money for. Just know that I don't actually expect any of my friends and family to spend exorbitant amounts of money, please do not! He can save money for the higher priced items just like the rest of us. It will do him well to learn the art of saving for what you want.

With that said, other than the registry, I think gift cards to Gamestop, Blockbuster, Marshall's, Ross, Lifeway, Chick-fil-A and McDonald's are all great ideas. He would also love passes/tickets to bowling or the movies, especially since I've already been informed there are 3 superhero movies coming out this summer. He is saving money for karate lessons and a six flags/whitewater season pass. Size wise, he's about a 14-16. I think he's doing pretty good on summer clothing right now, I hit some consignment sales prior to our trip to Latvia.

Again, anything you do for him is a gift beyond your comprehension! With $10, he feels like he can buy the world! Everyone I know has bills and needs so please do not feel obligated to get him a gift. Since he's not a young child, gifts don't come quite so cheaply and Jon and I understand that. We really just appreciate your prayers for all of us as we continue the adoption process which still requires two more trips to Latvia, wisdom regarding Ryan's schooling options this fall and for his transition into family life. Thank You!

Settling in...

We've had some fun moments this week. First, I want to share a cool story. I really wanted Ryan to be able to play Upward Soccer. He's never played on a team in his life. But, I didn't know when we'd get to go to our first court and whether we'd be allowed to bring him home, so I hadn't signed him up. Sunday, I emailed our church Upward soccer coordinator, told him we were home and that I really wanted Ryan to play if there was still room. Later that day, he called me to say he had a spot and his team's first practice was the following night. As if there was any question about God's timing regarding this child, Rich told me how he had prayed and felt God tell him we would have 300 kids this year in Upward soccer. A few weeks ago after printing the initial rosters, he had 279. He prayed again, leaving the 21 other kids in God's hands. As of Sunday, Ryan was officially the 21st child added to the rosters; making him #300. Every once in a while God lets us see his unique timing in simple, but tangible ways. Other people have first steps, we have first soccer practices!

An equally wonderful moment... a couple days ago, after I asked him what he wanted to eat, Ryan sat down to a warmed up piece of cheese pizza and a yoo-hoo. He looked at it happily and said, "Life doesn't get any better than this." I guess it is all about perspective isn't it.

Finally, in the quiet of the morning, I wrote this little number. I have some sweet people that are planning a "shower" for me. It makes me laugh only because I envision women actually having to use their husbands and sons for this shower, otherwise they are doomed to stand in the boy action figure aisle wondering who in the world all those strange creatures are. It’s a special feeling though, that even though we are "unconventional," friends and family still wish to celebrate our first child. Thinking about that, this came to me:

Bottles and formula have I none
But I’ll always have plenty of bubblegum

Instead of rotating mobiles with bears, moons or stars
I find myself looking at the remote control cars

My days won’t be filled with Baby Einstein DVDs
I’m asked to download music into his MP3

I don’t know about percentiles, but I think he’s fairly tall
Forget about training wheels, he’s already shooting a basketball

Between skates and scooters, plenty of Band-Aids for the knee
I know the combined fear and joy of hearing, “Hey mom, look at me.”

I haven’t a clue about karate and can only guess at a soccer game
I’m guessing my video game skills are also pretty lame

But, as he snuggles in beside me, he let’s out a sigh
Says, “mommas are always warm,” and a tear forms in my eye

My job isn’t to swaddle him, but to be his biggest fan
He’s not a baby, but a boy, growing into a Godly man

Ryan's Friends

We were so fortunate to be able to attend church services with Ryan on Good Friday and on Easter Sunday. Ryan traveled from his orphanage into Riga most Sunday's for church. He had to take a bus and a train to get there and was the only child that did this. His orphanage was about 80 miles from Riga. The social system kids have a public transportation pass and he knew which routes to take to get there. That church has been kind to him and for that I will forever be so grateful. They are the ones who sponsored him to Christian camp and each Sunday they fed him after church when all the families ate together. He had no many to pay, but they fed him anyway. It reminds me so much of Jesus' statement, whatever you do unto the least of these, you have done unto me. We never know whose need we are meeting as the body of Christ. In this case, Christians on the other side of the country were sowing seeds into the life of my child.

It was wonderful to follow him into church and watch him say hello to friends. He was so proud to introduce us as his new parents. While church was in Russian, they were some familiarities. We could tell when they were saying the Lord's prayer and I could easily sing along to the Russian version of "Via Dolorosa" and "Up from the grave he arose" on Easter Sunday Morning. Because of Easter, they weren't having their normal services so Ryan did not get to attend his Sunday afternoon kids church service, which is where he would have seen many more friends. Easter week was a holiday week in Latvia, so I think many children were away with their families visiting relatives. We only got to meet a few of his friends, but I thought you'd like to see some of those photos. The main shot was taken inside his church while the kids choir was singing. I hope, when he and I return for our third court trip, to attend services again with him and get more photos.

Slavic was a boy from church who met us on another day and toured Riga cathedral with us. He was out of school that week, like the other kids. While out, Jon and I stopped to check emails and Slavic and Ryan went off walking by themselves. As a nervous mother, I was just praying and hoping nothing happened and that they made good decisions while they were out and about. Imagine my surprise when the two of them returned on time with presents... for us. Slavic had spent his own money shopping with Ryan to buy us gifts. Jon got a pair of sunglasses and they bought me a snow globe. I felt bad that Slavic had spent so much money and I wanted to repay him, but he wouldn't let us and just said that he felt we were very good people and we were doing something very nice for his friend. He and Ryan had a good time, he seemed like a very sweet boy. He liked hearing about America and even came back to the apartment to watch movies with us later that night. We were sad to see him go but grateful for the time he spent with Ryan.

We were not able to go to the orphanage this trip, but plan to go there on our 3rd trip to Latvia. At that point, we'll have pictures of the children and teachers from the orphanage.

Old Town Riga

Because of the location of Ryan's orphanage and the court proceeding, we stayed in Riga, which is the capital city of Latvia. In Riga, we reserved an apartment with two bedrooms. Sometimes the court would rather you reserve an apartment because it's more like a home setting. Renting apartments is actually fairly common there, just as common as reserving a hotel here. There are many hotels, but only one "brand" name hotel in all of Riga that you would even recognize, a Radisson. Other than that, just a hodge-podge mix of hotels and furnished apartments. I think they are more economical for adoption because you can go to the market to get food to prepare in your kitchen, which is far cheaper than eating our for 10 days. We only ate at a restaurant 2 evenings and went to the McDonald's a couple times. Other than that, we cooked food in our apartment.

In Riga, there is the Old Town Riga area, which is where we stayed. This is really a neat area, full of history and really interesting buildings and churches. We walked all over the place. Our tour guide, Ryan himself, knew Riga very well and took us everywhere we needed to go. He really loved taking us new directions and yet always ending up at "home." We had a good time just walking and looking. These are some of the beautiful pictures we got in this Old Town area. I made sure to include a good snow shot so you could see what we were walking around in. The birds are right outside our window. Ryan leaned out to take that one. We were on the top floor of the building so we had a great view and the birds visited us often.

Introducing............... (drum roll) Ryan Blake

Well, after going through several names and testing them out in Latvia, he has decided on Ryan Blake to be his new name. He really likes it and while we know it will take you all some time to memorize it, just know that even we forget and call him by his old name occasionally. It will sink in with a little time. Here are some pictures I took of him while we were away in Latvia. He still looks at himself and just sees things he doesn't like. We look at him and just see a handsome boy. As for the graffiti shots, well, I think every boy thinks graffiti is cool. So, I include those because they were sort of neat looking.

It was colder than we expected. A bit of a winter storm rolled through. It's time for spring there, but during our trip came the last gust of a snowy winter. Luckily, Ryan had a coat and was able to bring it with him when he came to us at court. He brought his suitcase he took home from Christmas and when we got to the apartment an opened it up we found it practically empty. Only a few things remained from his time here at Christmas. Everything was gone, not a single toy remained but a hackysack. He had only a few shirts we had given him and his photo album, everything else was gone. Thank goodness I had planned for that and took several sets of clothes for him. He had been telling me all along as each thing was taken from him, but the shock of seeing a nearly bare suitcase really hit home that he wasn't kidding, everything was gone. We reminded him that it was ok, that he would have some new things when he got home.

Home Sweet Home

Hi everyone. Well, I wasn't able to update the blog while we were in Latvia, so today I'm going to catch up! I hope you enjoy seeing many of the pictures from our first adoption trip to Latvia. We got home last night, minus one bag that I hope shows up today. All total, 11 days were involved, so we are pretty tired, but incredibly happy to have our son home. There were tense moments, many on our knees in prayer, but what a wonderful feeling for me to look over at him as we were lifting off the runway in Riga, Latvia. We praise God that He prevailed. There were so many moments when I would simply pray Jeremiah 29:11, I knew the Lord knew His plans and I knew He wouldn't allow the enemy to steal them or alter them. All 3 of us came back as a stronger family unit, ready to embrace all of our new roles.

Latest Updates

We leave Atlanta on Tuesday, March 18th. We have been told that in all likelihood, Gvido should be able to come home with us. Our Latvian lawyer already has his embassy interview setup on the afternoon following court. So, everything looks good. It doesn't look like we will be able to visit his orphanage. Yesterday on the phone he told us that the plan was for him and the social worker to meet us at court and he would bring his things. Granted, virtually everything he took back with him after Christmas has been stolen or broken. We are having to pack clothes, shoes, socks, etc, because he doesn't have much left. Basically, his bag should be small, bless his heart.

I, of course, saw his orphanage when I visited with New Horizons last September. But, I'm sorry Jon will never have a visual of where our son has come to us from. It's unreal to see an orphanage. You just have no idea until you step into one. Having visited at least 20 at this point, some still surprise me. But, I'm going to trust God that He knows what's best for all of us. Gvido's orphanage director hasn't been there since the children returned from America back in January. She's been sick and in the hospital for a surgery. So, I already had a feeling the orphanage social workers might not want an adopting family there, if she wasn't.

Other than that, Gvido is "really, really" excited. He said he thinks the first thing he will do when he gets home is go to his room and sleep in his bed! Yesterday he was wondering if we could bring him some McDonald's. He has told us both about his "dream." His dream is to come to America and to get strong in body and mind. He wants others to look at him and believe he is a good person. He wants to be someone others think highly of. He also wants to work out and get strong physically. He says,, "I will get stronger than dad." It's the simplest dream in the world I suppose. But, coming from a child who's been pushed around, verbally assaulted, told he has no worth, no value, it's truly the thing nearest his heart. I tell him all the time how wonderful he is. One, I believe it. Two, he needs to hear it. Orphans are truly cast-offs. They are not valued as other people are in their society. Rarely do they come across an orphanage worker or teacher who actually places enough value on them so as to encourage them. I say it all the time, all they really need is someone to tell them they love them and they are great. As they grow to trust you, they begin to believe it. I thank God that this one can begin to dream again.

Headed to Latvia!

We just got word today from Latvia, we have our first court appearance next week! We have a total of three Latvian court appearances. This trip is court appearance number one and requires both Jon and I to attend. Hopefully we will receive approval to bring Gvido back home with us after this court appearance!

We are ecstatic. When I think about all the years that have passed, all the disappointments in the area of beginning our family, I acknowledge that I wasn't patient with God at times. I struggled to understand and I had difficulty seeing beyond the hurt. But in the waiting, God taught us so many lessons and grew our faith, patience, trust and widened our vision to go beyond our personal definition of family. When I think about my son, also waiting for years for God to deliver him and wondering where God was... I can now thank God for every moment of waiting, every hold, every no. If it weren't for that, I would not have had the unbelievable privilege of meeting the amazing young man last September who was to be my first born of heart. I think none of us can ever truly imagine the weaving of lives that takes place when we place our hope in God.

Chosen and introduced to us by God, we are incredibly grateful and humbled to share with you our wonderful news. I can't think of a better way to spend Easter, the celebration of new life, redemption and the resurrection of the very Savior who has guided us, than to spend it in Latvia with our new son. (If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer. Matthew 21:22)